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Slip-sliding on a peel - humor

 

Every day, or at least every other day, we make a fruit smoothie at mid morning. About not including fail, these smoothies control bananas; so, we go all through about 10 or 12 bananas a week. Depending on my mood or the availability, these smoothies may also confine mango, papaya, pineapple, coconut or at all other fresh fruit comes our way plus ice, water and the blender. Maybe also yoghurt or wheat germ.

However, banana is the usual and requisite smoothie base.

One day, after being out of bananas for an bad-tempered sum of time (say 2 or 3 days), I journeyed to town for the cock-crow farmer's market. I went to my consistent construct lady, Latina.

"Morning darling," she greeted me as usual, "How's your woman?"

"Almost as sweet and attractive as you," I reply, earning a kiss and a smile.

I pulled out out the a mixture of fruits and veggies that any trapped my concentration or she told me to buy. ("She'd be export this if she were here, ya know")

"Bananas?" I ask. "Nope. No bananas," she deadpans.

"Who has bananas then?" I ask, hopeful that she will point me to her desired competitor.

"No bananas anywhere. " She is adamant. "None?" I am incredulous, "They are the main crop of this island. How can there be no bananas? There are continually bananas. "

"T'ain't none nowhere now," she affirms.

"Are you difficult to tell me there are no bananas on an island that survives on its banana exports?"

"Yes, we have no bananas," she says with a wicked smile.

'Harry, desire save me', I think; 'this cannot be true; a calm fair flashback?'

'Come Mr. Tally man, tally me bananas; me tired and me want to go home' he echoes, answering from about 40 years ago. I go home, sans banana, stunned, dazed and confused.

Two days later, a fellow citizen shows up with 200 bananas. "I hear you want some," he says.

A few days later, we are having two smoothies a day and bountiful away banana bread to all our neighbors; a million fruit flies hover in my kitchen and, in my dreams, there is this frequent apparition of Carmen Miranda. I am a cultural refugee, trapped in a beyond Calypso tape loop or a cosmic funny side joke.

Leslie Fieger. All civil rights detached worldwide.

Leslie is the dramatist of The DELFIN Comprehension Coordination Trilogy: The Initiation, The Journey and The Quest plus many more hit publications. He also the co-author of The End of the World with Hugh Jeffries and Alexandra's DragonFire with his daughter Ashley. Subscribe to his free and ad-free eZine at http://www. ProsperityParadigm. com or http://www. LeslieFieger. com

Reprinting and republishing of these articles is arranged only with the above belief included. Authorization to reprint or republish does not waive any copyright.


MORE RESOURCES:



Mary Duddy: Humor at the dinner table  Hawaii Catholic Herald















Humor: Southern Cliches  The Lafayette Sun











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