Goldenarticles articles

Got originality? - humor


There are many ways to be fundamental these days. But sorry to say I cannot divulge any of these ways as the followers would then not be original, would they? Now, I appreciate that everywhere amid one to two ancestors would have followed the counsel I gave, but just in case my calculations were off - and it turns out three would have followed - I need to be cautious about what I write ?

One slogan which entirely frustrates me due to its lack of imagination is "got ____?" That's right - that lowercase expression which was formerly synonymous with milk (and is now synonymous with everything) is so clich that it's even clich to write "got clich?" But the worst is not after us. The other day I saw a sign for an ATM appliance that asked the question, "got cash?" This makes me astonishment how far the slogan will delay beforehand it at length fades. Here are five signs which I hope we never see, for any of them could mean the end of the world as we know it. And if it's the end of the world, how will we ever be able to celebrate the end of that slogan?

5. got goats? - I am not sure why this one would scare me. I guess it's a little about advertising goats to the mainstream that throws me off, or maybe I am frightened that too many far-sighted citizens will think it's an advertisement for coats. Both way, goats don't need to be a part of such a cliched design in order to be sold. That would be very baaaad. At least that's what a sheep told me.

4. got gas? - Just dream up the confusion. Those who need fuel in their cars would stop in order to fill their tanks. But what about those who just came back from the local Taco Bell? They don't need to be at a class where they can get gas. Rather, they need to be at a place where? Well, you get the picture.

3. got snot? - We don't need to be promotion snot, let alone business it. But if we are ever at a point where snot is a little in which associates befit interested, let's not hold down the sales by asking citizens if they have it, as eventually every person does.

2. got my mother? - No. .

1. got death? - If cemeteries start using this slogan, then we know the world has befall too commercialized. Not only is it a dark statement, but those who can key in the assenting will not even be given the chance to do so.

But I digress.

Greg Gagliardi is a educator and writer. His stream-of-consciousness weekly humor column, "Progressive Revelations," has been ongoing since 1998. (http://www. ProgressiveRevelations. com)


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